Originally published October 2, 2013, last updated November 5, 2015

Tips for Dating After 50

We chatted with Lisa Copeland, a dating coach at FindAQualityMan.com about dating tips she has for single women over 50.

Once she discovered what tools and skills were needed for over-50's dating, she began having fun dating.  Her friends noticed and wanted help so she shared what she'd discovered with them and they too, began dating great guys.  That's when she realized there were lots of women who could use this information and that's when she created her coaching business online.  Her passion is mentoring women to recognize how awesome they are along with what it takes to understand and relate to men in their personal and professional lives.

Why did you think it was important to start this business?

For 10 years  I suffered with dating because I just didn’t know what I was doing. When my first marriage ended, after taking some time to heal, I went online, because that’s what I thought you did.  I found that dating was really hard since I didn’t understand men, I didn’t know why I wasn’t getting second dates, and I didn’t know or understand the system  for dating online successfully.

My confidence was plummeting and I was miserable as I struggled with dating.  I didn't understand men and why second dates were so hard to come by.  I thought men were rejecting me.  I later learned they were not rejecting me personally.  I just didn't fit the picture of who a man thought he wanted.  Women do this too to men but when it happens to us, we take it so personally.  

I met my second husband online and married him within a year of meeting.  We had tremendous chemistry but a foundation of friendship was missing so less than 2 years after we married, we divorced.  I found myself single again and I felt like a failure.  I didn't want a repeat of my last relationship so I went looking for a dating coach.  The only problem was the dating coaches I found had information that was relevant to younger women not women over 50. 

Dating in your 50s is very different than dating in your 20s and 30s. Unable to find the right coach, I began researching everything I could about men and dating over 50.  I figured out what worked and found myself having fun dating.  And I discovered the secret key to getting second dates!

What’s the biggest dating hurdle you hear about from your clients?

The biggest one I hear is “There are no good men out there-or all the good ones are taken.”

I've found that women head out into the dating world looking for someone they will be attracted to.  What they are not doing is looking for someone who could be a great partner in a long term relationship.  This has nothing to do with looks.  It has to do with the whole package of who a man is.  By going after the "eye candy" you can miss really good guys out there who would love nothing more than to be your partner in life and make you happy. 

What are three tips you would like to share?

1. Go out and just have fun on a date getting to know someone new and interesting.  Stop trying to figure out if he's the one before you finish your cup of tea or coffee.

2. Love your life-go out there and live your passions.  This stokes the fires of your inner glow and this is what makes you so appealing to men.   Get happy being alone – have fun living your own life because that is when you are the most appealing.

3. Don't be afraid to get help with dating. So many people think it’s something they should naturally know how to do.  It's not-it's actually a learned skill if you want to be successful at it. 

Parting Thoughts?

Decide why you want a relationship at this time in your life.  You have lots of options you didn't have when you last dated.  You can marry a man, live with a man, have companionship with a man, or have a sexual relationship with a man when your hormones take over.  Then get out there and just have fun meeting new men.  A guy might not be your forever match but you just might gain a wonderful new male friend...and male friends are nice to have.  (so are female ones-they'll support you on this journey. 

Do you wonder where quality men are?  They are actually everywhere and I cover this in my free report, "The 5 Little Known Secrets To Finding Quality Men."  You can download it right now by going to www.findaqualityman.com.